Believe

Believe in yourself.

Believe in your strength, believe in all the pain you’ve overcome. All the people you’ve given too much too, or too much of yourself to, never to be returned the favour. All the days you’ve spent analysing how others feel for you, if they ever think about you on a weekly basis as much as you do about them on the daily. All the times you’ve wondered if they miss you as much as you miss them, because what else are you to assume when you’re the one always being the first to reach out? All the plans you’ve made for your future with them by your side, only for it to be shattered like a glass frame, because they’ve dissapointed you…once again. All the times you’ve said yes when you wanted to say no, only because you were made to believe that a yes will make them like you more. All the times people have left you even though you fought for them till the very end; all the times you’ve wished someone – anyone – would fight tooth and nail for you, because aren’t you enough? All the times you’ve celebrated your achievements in silence and your failures in solitude, because there was never any another option. All the dreams that you’ve dreamed, the hope you hold within your heart regardless of how beat down it feels. All the ghosts of your past which haunt you as you struggle to sleep at night, the ghosts who haunt your dreams, years later, unable to push them out of your life, as hard as you try. All the years you’ve spent internalising your thoughts, all the years you’ve been denied your sense of self, all the years you’ve bent over backwards to know avail, and now, here you lie, a broken, crippling mess.

You’ve been through hell and back, a hell you keep returning to from time to time, burried beneath lies and secrets for the sake of how others will see you and judge. And yet – here you are. Standing strong, still, moving forwards despite the winds pushing you back. You’ve made it this far – you never thought you would, did you? Courage, that’s the word for you. You’re brave for your very existence. Look at you! Smiling into the sea as the sun drowns into the horizon lighting the sky with the colours of your mind. Yellow, orange, pink, purples and blues – how diverse you are! How diverse are your abilities! You’re capable of this and so much more, aren’t you excited to see? Within the bad, there’s always been the good, and hasn’t the good always been so incredibly life changing? You continue to learn, to grow, to nurture yourself and to be – and what is more admirable than that, really?

Just look at you – the lengths you have gone and the roads you’ve transcended. How can you look at yourself, your past, and still require the validation of others? Still need others to celebrate you, to be proud of you, to hold your hand and to believe in you? You are all you’ve ever needed. You are more than sufficient for yourself and the all the lives you’ve lead and you continue to lead. So, trust in yourself. Put aside all the clutter, the noise, the hopes and the dreams and focus on being you.

Because if you don’t believe in yourself, who will?